Wednesday, 23 March 2011

What the hell is wrong with me?

I'm looking at job descriptions, trying to find something worth applying for and all I've succeeded in doing is making myself feel like I'm good for nothing. I hate myself for feeling so pathetic but reading through person specifications is just terrifying me. I dont like the thought of being responsible for too much as I'm really not sure if I can cope with it. BUT this is not a good attitude to have as I actually do want to have some semblance of a normal career so I'm going to have to just get on with it.

I do know deep down that I'm not completely useless. If I were would I have had such a successful modelling career? Before that I did pretty well working at a newspaper in Swindon, so I know I can cope with a normal job. I just wish I felt a little more grounded and stable. Went to an information session to find out about jobs with the Olympics committee today and spent most of it feeling like I was about to burst into tears. Right - better get back to it.

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